On many occasions we think whether we would fail or succeed in a particular situation. Sometimes whole life we remain in this grip. This leads to the wastage of time. There are many possibilities. Some think that this all is normal. But when we get stuck to an idea this leads to abnormalities. We must always remember that the extreme of anything is bad.
There are two kinds of people, optimists and pessimists. But Dr Khalid Jamil, famous scholar from Pakistan and head of Rehab Centre, Mayo Hospital, takes both of these kinds as failure in life. He says that there is a need that we inculcate the same belief as was cultivated by Tariq Bin Ziyad when he burnt the boats. He was having assurance in his heart that he would conquer Spain. This kind of belief also lends us a rare confidence which enables us to perform better.
At every stage in life we have to be certain. Ultimate success is achieved when we resort to faith. It enables us to get focused in our attention towards an objective. Otherwise our energies pine and languish away in pursuit of useless objectives. There are ten billion cells in our brain and if we are certain about some cause, they would all be concentrating on a single object. Hence we must not let our energies add-on the negative objectives.
Living in the world of possibilities hinders development. As for instance undue thinking about profits or losses when we invest in some business, or harping repeatedly about attaining a top position or getting a failure in exam if one is a student, in this state one is tantamount to remain consistently in a lurking state of fear. The fear that a specific position may not be lost if once got also makes life terrible.
We must rest assured that it is less of our physical state and more of mental input which encourages us to pursue an objective and work with a new vigour. Many big achievers are not high degree holders. They do not waste time in unimportant things. From such people we can gain an insight that they do not harbor unnecessary fears in their minds. We must pick good things from the successful people from different walks of life. Always remember that fears and possibilities may encumber our success in life.
Our behaviours are ample determinants of getting at success in life. If we are confident and sure about reaching at our destination then we can guarantee victory to a great extent. Strong will power and confidence make us strong and a unique dedication ensues upon along with it. Stress and frustration kill hope in youth specially. I myself have encountered this embedded notion in the minds of young and their parents too who are anxious for getting some job but believe firmly that it is not possible without a big reference or greasing the palms of the authorities. One must shun this fixed thinking as still much recruitment are made strictly on merit and the amount of oil which is burnt at midnight doesn’t go waste at the end of the day. It all depends on a state of mind. Our youth is deviating from the habits of being workaholic. They need to know that without hard work it is impossible that they would be able to get success.
It is also true at the same time that there are some people who are not in search of getting success overnight. Their ways are hampered by other causes as family pressure, some terminally ill family member or financial restraints. Such people may get frustrated when they fail to achieve the target. Otherwise in a normal life getting frustrated or stressed up is perfectly normal. But being caught by unforeseen fears all the time would blemish the potential momentously. Excessive fears eventually lead to stress. When our desires and ambitions cannot materialize in practical shapes or see the dawn of the day we feel greatly undone. In such a case we may change our priorities rather than sticking to one goal.
Often our youth is not clear about their goals. There is a lack of planning and they just desire for the moon. This kind of approach leads to creating innumerable problems for them. Their power of decision making suffers lot. As an after effect, lethargy may take on and procrastination may occur. Such people have, in a way, problem for every solution. Some even develop recourse to physical violence too just as a measure to getting rid of frustration. However there can be positive ways to tackle this situation. Participating in sports is a very good solution. Others may include involving in a monologue in some serene place as trees or lake, boating or proceeding on a journey. Meditation, reflection and recollection are also good techniques. Often it so happens that a person is unable to reach at some good solution of a minor problem. His thoughts may get disarrayed in his mind. But if he starts writing or talking aloud in isolation about his problems, he himself reaches at some conclusion after identifying what the problem actually is. Maintaining the gratitude register is a good way to say thanks to the ultimate Creator and counting upon His blessings. It provides a strong support system to ease us out in times of trouble.
Dr Khalid Jamil further says that anger is not a negative human reaction. It is perfectly positive one as it is an energy which must be utilized properly and purposefully. Anger gives us a chance to prepare for planning for life ahead. When we are angry, our brain works on a higher level and we can make better decisions with our thinking paraphernalia. But if someone misbehaves with us and we go on wasting our time in planning to rebuff, then it would be mere wasting of energies. Resultantly a series of negative results follow. Why to allow others to control our lives by enjoying our plight and getting amused to see us reacting in silly ways to their deliberate instigations? William Blake too denounces such behaviour in his poem“A Poison Tree” by acquainting us that we must not allow anger to nurture in our hearts and minds. One other way to avoid the grisly outcome is to walk away from the place where staying and answering back may create fracas. Withdrawing from the scene would ensure that the fury would not be further ignited and the ire is quite likely to cool down after some time. I would like to share the narrative of some colleague here who did not write down the annual evaluation report of some junior officer in an angry state simply because he thought he could air some bias in that and mar his career. Such examples are indeed good examples to emulate. Anger simply mutilates our physical energies and wrecks havocs on decision making power.
Giving people an ear lets them a chance to fizzle out their pent up emotions and serve the purpose of catharsis. Since we are social creatures, this factor cannot be denied that sometimes a person alone cannot be enough to overcome some precarious and threatening situation. The Circumstances, his social milieu and domestic environment also contribute a lot in this regard. It is said that suicide is hundred percent preventable if the family, friends and media play their supporting role to save a person who is in the grip of depression.